In the beginning, the press could not understand our
refusal of all personal publicity. They were genuinely baffled by our
insistence upon anonymity. Then they got the point. Here was something rare in
the world—a society which said it wished to publicize its principles and its
work, but not its individual members. The press was delighted with this
attitude. Ever since, these friends have reported A.A. with an enthusiasm which
the most ardent members would find hard to match.
— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 182
It is essential for my personal survival and that of the Fellowship that I not use A.A. to put myself in the limelight. Anonymity is a way for me to work on my humility. Since pride is one of my most dangerous shortcomings, practicing humility is one of the best ways to overcome it. The Fellowship of A.A. gains worldwide recognition by its various methods of publicizing its principles and its work, not by its individual members advertising themselves. The attraction created by my changing attitudes and my altruism contributes much more to the welfare of A.A. than self-promotion.
This is a tough one for me. I see what working the 12 steps and attending AA meetings has done to transform my outlook on life, and I want to tell everyone about it. I want to tell everyone how long it has been since I drank. I want to share that the mental obsession to drink is utterly gone. I want compare my way of thinking and living before to the way it is now.
I want to, but I usually don't. I look at the example other with greater spiritual growth have set for me. They simply live in a way that makes others say "I want what she has" or "I really respect him and want to live like he does." Sometimes I catch myself talking about my new way of thinking, and I'm disappointed in myself.
At this stage in my spiritual growth, humility is sometimes just a mask I wear as I try to permanently rewire my thinking and deal a daily deathblow to my ego. I don't want to wear a mask of humility. I want to cultivate a truly humble heart. Right now, it's a little of both. The pride in my newfound way of living is sometimes there, but I think about what I'm going to say and I keep those feelings locked up, and speak with genuine humility and reserve. Slowly, ever so freaking slowly, the thoughts of pride and ego are becoming the second or third thing that spring to mind - not the first.
The analogies for me are always physical. Its no different that training in the morning. At first, I hated waking up early. I hated the drive to the gym at 5:30 in the morning. I had to pretty much fake my enthusiasm until it became real. Discipline lead to change. Change can't bring about self discipline. Funny thing is, my pastor spoke about it just yesterday: You don't get right and THEN start walking with God. You just decided to go to God and walk with him, and little by little, or sometimes dramatically, you'll start living right.
I'm perfectly content to change little by little. I've seen what adding one more rep can do for my body over the course of months. Just 5 more pounds to the bar every few weeks makes an incredible transformation over the years. My walk with Christ in sobriety is no different. One conversation at a time, one opportunity to practice humility at a time, one act of silent service at a time I'll be a transformed man over the years to come.
— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 182
It is essential for my personal survival and that of the Fellowship that I not use A.A. to put myself in the limelight. Anonymity is a way for me to work on my humility. Since pride is one of my most dangerous shortcomings, practicing humility is one of the best ways to overcome it. The Fellowship of A.A. gains worldwide recognition by its various methods of publicizing its principles and its work, not by its individual members advertising themselves. The attraction created by my changing attitudes and my altruism contributes much more to the welfare of A.A. than self-promotion.
This is a tough one for me. I see what working the 12 steps and attending AA meetings has done to transform my outlook on life, and I want to tell everyone about it. I want to tell everyone how long it has been since I drank. I want to share that the mental obsession to drink is utterly gone. I want compare my way of thinking and living before to the way it is now.
I want to, but I usually don't. I look at the example other with greater spiritual growth have set for me. They simply live in a way that makes others say "I want what she has" or "I really respect him and want to live like he does." Sometimes I catch myself talking about my new way of thinking, and I'm disappointed in myself.
At this stage in my spiritual growth, humility is sometimes just a mask I wear as I try to permanently rewire my thinking and deal a daily deathblow to my ego. I don't want to wear a mask of humility. I want to cultivate a truly humble heart. Right now, it's a little of both. The pride in my newfound way of living is sometimes there, but I think about what I'm going to say and I keep those feelings locked up, and speak with genuine humility and reserve. Slowly, ever so freaking slowly, the thoughts of pride and ego are becoming the second or third thing that spring to mind - not the first.
The analogies for me are always physical. Its no different that training in the morning. At first, I hated waking up early. I hated the drive to the gym at 5:30 in the morning. I had to pretty much fake my enthusiasm until it became real. Discipline lead to change. Change can't bring about self discipline. Funny thing is, my pastor spoke about it just yesterday: You don't get right and THEN start walking with God. You just decided to go to God and walk with him, and little by little, or sometimes dramatically, you'll start living right.
I'm perfectly content to change little by little. I've seen what adding one more rep can do for my body over the course of months. Just 5 more pounds to the bar every few weeks makes an incredible transformation over the years. My walk with Christ in sobriety is no different. One conversation at a time, one opportunity to practice humility at a time, one act of silent service at a time I'll be a transformed man over the years to come.
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